10 Days Late

No, not what you think. I told myself I'd start weaning from the pump one month before Olivias birthday. And I haven't started. I even had it in my planner: "Feb 1: WEANING!!!!"

I can't bring myself to do it. Why? I feel an enormous amount of guilt. I guess it's that mommy guilt rearing it's ugly head. She does so well on breastmilk. What if cows milk just doesn't do her any good? What if she hates it? Breastmilk provides all these antibodies. Should I just keep going until flu season is over at least?

We got a new dishwasher so washing bottles and pump parts has become a thing of the past. Our awesome Samsung dishwasher sanitizes and it is really just amazing. But weaning would free up so much of my time. Sigh. I know I gotta start soon.

I had a dream last night I had another baby girl. And I've been thinking all day about having another baby. After Olivia was born, I told myself I would NEVER do it again. But I miss that newborn-ness. I feel like I was so delirious from the labor and the c section that I didn't get to really enjoy it. This time, it's an automatic c section so it might be easier? Idk. I would like Olivia to be walking and out of diapers first. Mr. Ho wants a Dragon. Olivia is a special tiger - a white tiger and apparently this upcoming dragon is special too. But the tiger and the dragon won't get along because they will both be so fierce.

I'm getting way ahead of myself.

Olivia can clap on cue now. It's adorable!! I love when she Gives me love. She rubs her face all over mine. Or I love When she takes a break from playing and will crawl over to rest her head on me. She also starts "singing" along when she she's really in the mood.

Excuse the typos. I'm on my phone. Gnite!!