The Reason For The Season!

MERRY CHRISTMAS, dear readers!

I am so blessed to have you in my life.  I hope you have a wonderful holiday.  Don't forget the reason for the season - baby Jesus!

An executive decision has been made - I am no longer doing FIVE FUN FACTS.  I feel like I'm whoring myself out there, giving my stories away too fast.  But here's a good one.

This person, who shall remain nameless, gave me the worst Christmas present EVER.  It was this set from Victoria's Secret - a red and black silk/lace cami and underwear set.  Sounds decent, right?

I was 9 years old.

Imagine the look on my father's face as I unwrapped THAT one!

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!

RE: Comments

Dear Anonymous,

I know who you are.

Love ya!

XOXO,

Mrs. Ho 

Overheard At The Gym

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Boots & Bedding

Lately, I've been preoccupied with a couple things - finding the perfect pair of flat black leather boots and finalizing our bedding.  I should be more Christmas-focused, especially since our name is written all over this holiday - HO HO HO, anyone?  

First, I've been coveting these Loeffler Randall boots since I saw a picture of Blake Lively wearing them in a magazine.  I even cut out the picture - more on my magazine reading habits another day. Retails around $700.  

Readers, you know my problem (refer to the entry dated November 10, 2008).  With boots and sneakers, I can get by with a size 5 or when I'm desperate, a 5.5.  Well, I decided I need flat black boots.  And once I decide I need something, I NEED it.  It's this uncontrollable urge that consumes me.  

Days of internet searching later, I find these babies, at the lowest price of $91 AND a size 5!

Pretty damn good match, right?!  (Soaking in your awe of my bargain hunting saavy...)

Now bedding is another story.  You must go to the store to inspect quality and color.  We just painted our room a blue-gray with white moldings and I want a mostly white bed with gray touches.  I go to Bed Bath & Beyond because we have a lot of store credit from the wedding and I love their 20% coupons. I almost bought these 800 count sheets but Pure Beech bedding caught my eye.  If you need new sheets, please buy these.  They are the softest sheets EVER, good for sensitive skin, eco-friendly, keeps you cool, AND stays bright wash after wash.

I've grown up with one pillow, one blanket, and one fitted sheet.  But this time around, I want a bed with tons of pillows and just so fluffy looking you want to stay in bed all day long (not that I need that).  

I do have one question though:  I don't get the flat sheet.  The way you tuck it in?  What is the point of it?  It always ends up pissing me off in the middle of the night because it's tangled between my legs. Someone enlighten me, please.

This perfect bed obsession is pretty fruitless because we NEVER make the bed.  I find it so pointless. Why waste time and energy when the situation will be the same 12 hours later?  But I do have some bed rules, which are:

1.  You must shower before getting into bed.
2.  Don't put any foreign objects on the bed - dirty clothes, bags, etc...
3.  Duvet buttons must always be at the top when sleeping.
4.  Don't get NEAR the bed in clothes you've worn outdoors or near Rocky.
5.  I don't like anyone other than Mr. Ho or myself to touch, sit, and especially lay on our bed.

It comes down to one rule, really.  Keep the bed clean!  It's only for our benefit.  Bed bugs are NASTY! And germs are worse. 

This blog entry made me out to be a bit OCD, huh?  I know I have control issues.  Maybe I'll try to work on them as a new year resolution.

Probably not!

My Crystal Ball

So train-wreck Lily Allen decided to make her own Chanel t-shirt out of a Hanes.  

 

I'd like to make a prediction right now.  I think Karl Lagerfeld is going to make a replica of this t-shirt and charge $150 for it.  

Today was an emotional roller coaster.  We got new bedroom furniture (amazing).  But the two old, fat delivery-men could not lift the dresser up the stairs.  So Mr. Ho, the brother, and two of our friends did it.  They did a great job, but man oh man, I was so anxious the entire time.  I kept envisioning that huge dresser falling back and crushing someone.  I said a quick prayer before they started.  And once the job was done, I realized my armpits were sweating.  I know that's disgusting, but I was amazed I was even sweating - I rarely sweat.  I was so nervous my sweat glands felt it. 

Sweet dreams, readers.  I'm going to la-la land in my new bed!

Lots of Births Today

Today is a big day for birthdays!

HAPPY 18th, HANA!

HAPPY 27th, DHUANG!

HAPPY 27th, FITZ!  

(And if I've missed your birthday in the past, I apologize.  I decided to give out birthday shout-outs after my brother's big day...)

It must be a day of miracles.  I woke up at 730 AM!  I don't know if it was 100% natural because I woke up to the sounds of my poor doggie puking.  I hate dog puking - it's constant heaving until this nasty froth comes out.  

So, I've been uber productive already - made dinner in the slow-cooker, tidied up, and not to mention, blogged!  Now I'm off to run some errands, where I will try not to spend that much money.  Mr. Ho and I reviewed our bank statement and 95% of the transactions were all ME!  Guilty as charged.  

Embarrassment of Riches

One of my regular routines at the gym is the Stairmaster, which I love to use when I'm feeling lazy because it is slow-paced but gets your heart racing.  Usually, I'm drenched by the time I'm finished.  I love reading tabloids or fashion magazines while I'm going at it, but last week, I read an article in Newsweek on luxury shame.  

Nowadays, it's all about being a Recessionista versus a Fashionista.  Even the rich are trying to hide their wealth, downsizing, downgrading and downturning everywhere you look.  Posh Spice told a tabloid that she shops at Claire's - clearly, the biggest lie of the year!!  Are you surprised with the sh*t economy?  In my opinion, it was bound to happen.  I'm bummed that it happened - who doesn't love the good life?  But the bubble was getting way too big and it was ready to pop.  There was way too much bling and money being thrown out the window with the assumption that it would always be there tomorrow.  

Now that it's time to change, what are you doing to save that last penny?  I try to do my part.  Here are my five money-saving ways:

1.  I use a flashlight around the house - no lights, low electricity bill. 

2.  I flush the toilet after four uses.  No matter what pleasantries I drop into it.

3.  I wear my gym socks and sports bra for two weeks before washing.  

4.  Meal scraps are dumped into a pot for a delicious hodge-podge soup at the end of the week.

5.  I'm collecting my hair to turn into a nice sweater.  I'll use Rocky's fur to make a cute design in the center!

Just kidding.  I hope you actually didn't think I would do those things.  

Even if you are buying your Christmas gifts at the .99 Cent Store this year, let's still be grateful for all the blessings we have in this life.  I'm mentally gifting you with champagne wishes and caviar dreams.  You're welcome.  

Evolver

Mr. Ho and I went to the John Legend concert at DAR Constitution Hall last night.  He was AMAZING.  He sounds EXACTLY the way he does on his cds, proving his talent.  His voice is smooth like butta.  I love him!

I am still on a high!

And the best part of the night... he sang our wedding song!  Here's a little clip.  Its a little blurry in the beginning but it will straighten out soon.  I wish those girls sat their asses down.  

Detergent...Everywhere

Today started out like all my other Mondays - cleaning and laundry day.  I clean the entire house, minus the basement since that's the brother's territory, and I do all the laundry - whites, darks, sheets, towels, Rocky's bedding, rags, etc.  

I've pretty much finished the first floor when my mom calls.  While we are chatting, I happen to hear a slight *boom* from the laundry room but I thought nothing of it because our washing machine and dryer make random noises here and there.  

After our weekend catch-up, I go to get the laundry and ... I just have no words to describe what it looked like.  Hence, the title of this blog - DETERGENT...EVERYWHERE.  That "slight *boom*" was my detergent bottle falling on the floor and spilling it's concentrated ickiness ALL OVER THE DAMN place.  And I mean ALL over.  It's definitely BEHIND the dryer.

I was so distraught!  I contemplated taking a picture of the mess for my dear readers, but my control issues kicked in hardcore and I started cleaning immediately.  It was awful.  Concentrated detergent has somewhat of a substance to it so it hadn't spread too, too badly.  But I had to drag the dryer and get behind there and start cleaning.  Perhaps it was a blessing in disguise, because I noticed that the dryer tube thingy was just taped on - not clamped.  Plus, there was a lot of lint back there, so maybe cleaning that out will prevent a fire in the future.  (I'm just trying to find the silver lining because my hands and feet still feel like they have a slight detergent coating to them.  Yuck.  And my back is killing me.  Oy vey, I feel old).  I went to Home Depot to get this circular thingymajigy and screwdrived that thing onto the dryer tube thingy.  And it was a success!

Super proud of myself, but exhausted.  I don't know when was the last time I used a screwdriver.  The detergent fiasco cost me 3.5 hours and my chores were extended into the evening.  My therapist, wine - and lots of it, is doing its healing.  

Danny's birthday party was a success.  He had a lot of fun and I did as well!  I told myself I'd stick with wine and keep it cool.  But I changed my mind and stuck with vodka - extra dirty Grey Goose martinis, my fav.  The Moet was probably my tipping point.  Long story short, it got a little rowdy after we left the lounge and my ghetto side kicked in - without Patron, apparently.  I got in some chick's face (because she was yelling at my brother and everyone knows I am uber-protective over that boy) and started pulling her hair.  Thankfully, Mr. Ho saved the day and pulled me away before any damage could occur.  My hero <3...>

A BIGGG CONGRATULATIONS to the future Dr. and Mrs. Park on their engagement!!!

Annoyed At Idiots!

What part of:

DANIEL'S 24TH SURPRISE BIRTHDAY GET TOGETHER!!  KEEP IT ON THE HUSH HUSH!! 

do you NOT understand?? 

Especially when you responded to the Evite you couldn't make it already?  What made you feel the need to go up to Danny four days later and tell him that you couldn't make it tonight?  Did you do this crap on purpose because no one would ever want to throw you a party??

YOU ARE AN IDIOT.

This is what I would say to the person who blew my brother's FIRST EVER surprise party.  If he shows up tonight, and if I've been drinking Patron - Patron makes me belligerent - he will SO hear it.  But who knows, it takes a lot for me to confront someone, but at least I have my blog to have imaginary bitch sessions!  

BTW, HAPPY BIRTHDAY Baby Brother + EJenks!

You Can Sleep When You Die

Can I tell you how much I disagree with this statement?  I admire people who don't need too much sleep.  Mr. Ho is like this.  He functions pretty perfectly on minimal sleep and his body is programmed to wake up early - every single day.  On the weekends, he is very wise and tries to leave the house for a little while so I can sleep even longer.  I so appreciate a quiet house and he knows the wrath he will face if I'm forced to get up.  

I think I sleep for the dreams.  I have great, vivid dreams - adventure dreams, sad dreams (where I actually wake myself from real tears), and even sexy dreams (where Mr. Ho is the star, of course.  Hubba Hubba).  Even if I wake for a bit, I can force myself to continue where I left off.  I love dreaming.  I don't know how many times I've called Young and said, "So I dreamt last night..."

For the past seven months, I have spent A LOT of time sleeping.  I cannot even admit how late I sleep in.  It's a bit embarrassing.  The problem may be that our room is very dark, even if it's full-on sunny outside.  I asked Mr. Ho to open the blinds before he leaves for work, but he has yet to do so.  

I made a few observations of my sleep habits that I know are just so fascinating, that I had to share...  

1.  I fall asleep on my sides/stomach.

2.  If I stay up after 2 am, it is SO much harder to fall asleep.

3.  I get the BEST sleep after Mr. Ho leaves for work.  I snuggle into the middle of the bed and spread out as much as I can.

4.  Rocky sleeps in as long as I do.  

5.  I get hot feet.  I always have to have at least one foot outside of the blankets.  I told my mom how I do this and she said that her brothers do the same thing.  Blood doesn't lie.  

There you go, FIVE FUN (SLEEP) FACTS.

I was up way early today (for me, anyway) - at 7 am!  I had to help the elderly today, specifically my cute grandparents.  

Hmmm... I think I shall take a nap now.  

The Holiday Spirit

2008 is almost to an end, it's already December!  Once Thanksgiving hits, everything else is a crazy whirlwind until the new year.  The new year in which I will turn 27.  Ugh.

Thanksgiving in Mississippi was a great time, as expected.  I miss my parents so much.  Everytime we part ways at the airport, I always tear.  Since Mr. Ho was with me this time, I tried to hold back, but he has Mrs. Ho-Crying-Radar or something, because he always catches me just when the tears are about to hit!  

I wish I could SHIZAM my parents to where we live forever and ever.  My dream would be to own a huge house with an equally huge guest house, where my parents would reside.  Come on, Lotto!  

My father fried our turkey this year and it was DELICIOUS.  I felt the need to name our turkey, because dad spent so much time cleaning it and rubbing it down with all the seasonings.  Yeah, I got attached to the dead bird.  I asked dad to do the honors, and the man named our turkey, EatChopChop.  Senseless, yet perfect.  I actually made the rest of the sides and spent the rest of the evening downing the magnum-sized bottle of wine. 

Do you know what you want for Christmas this year?  Since we are officially in a recession, I guess my list needs to be recession-friendly.  So I say, I want nothing.  But, if you really want to know, I definitely have a list.  Remember that show Boy Meets World with Ben Savage?  There was this episode where Cory Matthews' mother is all upset because her husband buys her a dishwasher for their anniversary and she thought it was so unromantic and the husband thought it was just very practical.  I enjoy practical gifts.  If I got a new refrigerator, I'd accept it with open arms!  Beggars can't be choosers.  I'd like to clarify, that I don't want a dishwasher or a refrigerator, however.  That clarification was specifically for Mr. Ho.  

Random story:  Today I went to Target to look for 2009 planner refills, but alas, they didn't have the size I was looking for.  I left empty-handed, probably a FIRST for Target, and headed over to my car.  I'm still not used to parking the new car, so I had awhile to walk because I parked so, so far away.  I was walking in the same direction as this other lady (who I swear, was talking to herself) and who I noticed was very, very tall.  In the distance, I saw my Range Rover and saw a Smart Car - those ridiculous clown cars.  I literally jump into my car (I can't reach sometimes) and see the tall lady get into her Smart Car.  This situation reaffirmed that I certainly have a Napoleon Complex.  

Long overdue FIVE FUN FACTS...

1.  Back when I was 5 or so, my cousin, who is about 15 years older than me, asked the ladies in the car (my mom, aunt, and other girl cousins) if any of us had a brush.  I, always prepared, had one and handed over my miniature pink Barbie brush.  And he used it.

2.  At our Andover Lane house, there was this black cat that would sit in front of our deck door and meow all night long, everyday for about a month.  So creepy.

3.  I love squid - dried squid, boiled squid, sushi squid.  My mother revealed that my grandmother first gave me dried squid when I was a year old so I would stop crying and I'd suck on that thing for hours.

4.  I can read really fast.  A book usually takes hours.  Although, the book I'm currently reading (all 1000 pages of it), Anna Karenina is taking FOREVER.  This is my third attempt at this monstrosity.  

5.  My favorite smelling room in the house is....  the closet with all the cleaning products!  I hope heaven smells like Swiffer.

PS.  I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE A PSA.  I KNOW THERE ARE SPACING ISSUES IN SOME POSTS, BUT IT'S NOT ME, I PROMISE.  I AM TOO ANAL TO LET THOSE THINGS JUST PASS.  SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH BLOGSPOT AND I'D LIKE THEM TO FIX IT.  NOW.  IT DRIVES ME CRAZY.