Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

I must look EXACTLY like I did in high school.  Just like in the streets of Hong Kong, someone from high school spots me in a crowd of people.  We were walking downtown and an old classmate shouts out my name.

I welcome youth but I hope I look wiser/prettier/more mature than I did in high school.  

I don't know why I am not sleeping right now.

Where the Heart Is

Yesterday, I went back to my hometown to attend Chelle's bachelorette party.  I've gone back to Frederick to run a few errands, but have not gone downtown in a long time.  It was nice to be back - driving around route 40, down the dark-ass roads by Fitz's house.  I enjoyed walking around downtown and seeing how much the town has changed, and not changed.  Parts of downtown are so beautiful, but there are still ignorant jerks, but I guess you can find those anywhere.  It was fun running into people I haven't seen in years, but I think I will have to trim the fat on Facebook.  I figure if you can't say hi to me when you see me in person, then we shouldn't be Facebook friends.

Even though nostalgia hit me like a ton of bricks, at the same time, I felt like a stranger.  When I'm in the middle of my tight knit circle of girlfriends, I feel very much at home.  They are really the only reason I am still connected there.  But, I don't even know how to get around anymore - I thought Middletown was near Walkersville.  Most of all, I felt kind of out of place.  Even though it's home, it's not anymore.  I felt a sigh of relief when I got near Tysons Corner, a bit giddy when I rounded up Nutley Street, and elation when I got into my own bed.  

10 years ago, Frederick was all I knew.  I never thought I would let it go, but now I realize I have.  When did that happen?  I've come so far from where I was.  And I'm happy right here!

My MOH Speech

Hello.

My name is Mrs. Ho and I am honored to call SIL my sister-in-law.  I am also her matron-of-honor/wedding helper.

When SIL first started planning her wedding, I gave her some space and helped her with what you called “matron of honor duties” – dress shopping, bridal shower planning – little things.

But as time went on, I noticed she showed so much more enthusiasm for everything OTHER than wedding planning, including:  pulling weeds from my yard (we like to call that landscaping), cleaning out my basement storage room, hanging up pictures, going to the paint store 6 times to find the perfect shade of red for my kitchen, reading the entire Twilight series, eagerly anticipating the next episode in her Korean drama, wrangling me into watching 2 seasons of Dexter back-to-back, and when I thought she was doing wedding stuff in her room, I would come to find that she was actually finding ways to sponsor me in Mrs. Asia USA pageants. 

So I stepped in and we made a business deal that I would help her with the details.  When she sent me emails to add to my ever-growing to-do list, she would also add lines like, “I hope you will love me again one day.”

I would laugh out loud reading lines like that, because there is nothing that would keep me from loving her.  Even though I think she is crazy at times, she’s still my sister.

SIL has been living with us for the past year and I was definitely open to her moving in, frankly, because I knew I always had the option of kicking her back to her parent’s house.  We have had such an amazing time living together.  We’ve worked on our fitness with our personal trainer, my husband, Mr.Ho.  It’s so much easier to laugh when he yells at you for “deviating from the regimen” when you really just want to cry.  SIL would push his buttons by suggesting we do pull-up contests, and bench-pressing contests rather than follow his routine.

We successfully alienated my neighbors a little more.  Whether it be swigging champagne on the front stoop while their kids are playing outside or running sprints in the middle of the road with an unleashed bulldog while the neighbors are driving home from work.  Or when we formed an impromptu Neighborhood Watch Group called Crimewatch: Farrcroft! by ringing a neighbor’s doorbell at 1 AM to tell them their car had been running for the past 4 hours.

And at the same time, SIL has taught me things along the way.  Like her awesome new moves from her DanceJam classes, which I’m sure she will demonstrate for us later this evening.  Or how to make snackpaks by basically throwing in all leftover chips, cookies, and cracker crumbs into a ziplock baggie and keeping in my purse in case I get hungry on the fly.  Or the benefits of prophylactic drug usage.  I learned her favorite subject in school was pharmacology and she taught me that if you’re feeling sick, you better take that medicine, even if you’ve been drinking.  She’s my kind of doctor! 

SIL, the new appointed Poon-Tai Junior, I feel so lucky that I’ve had this past year with you.   I had the opportunity to get to know you so well.  And we have strengthened and fortified our relationship, our sisterhood for life.  Even though you are 6 months older than me, I have this strange urge to always take care of you – to feed you, to house you, to protect you from mean girls – like when you asked me to yell at the 12-year olds who were staring us down at the mall.  And now that you will be across the world from me, and not down the hallway, I feel reassured that you have BIL to look after you – to make sure you are healthy, happy, and entertained.

I’ve been married a little over a year, which obviously makes me an expert on marriage.  So I can tell you two to always confide in each other, to trust each other, to be honest with each other.  Even though there will be times you might want to hold a pillow over their face while their sleeping, you will never find a better friend, a BFF, than your spouse. 

SIL + BIL, I love you two so much.  Congratulations!  Cheers, everyone!

(FE)Male

Once upon a time, if you saw a man shopping in the women's section, you thought, "Aw.  What a nice guy.  Buying a present for a woman in his life."  Mother, sister, grandmother, daughter, BFF, whatever.

Now, you see the same man in the women's section, and you think, "I bet he's a cross-dresser."

My, how times have changed.

I saw a cross-dresser at Ulta today.  From behind, a beautiful blonde - perfectly coiffed hair, great sundress, cute wedge heels.  From the front, total adam's apple.  

SIL's VA Wedding

24 hours from now, I hope to be drunk and happy that SIL's wedding went without a hitch!  Please send me good vibes for my speech.  I'm already getting nervous!

I wore my Loubs for the 2nd time today.  I am in love.  They are amazingly comfortable!  Much more than the YSLs.

OK, need to stop procrastinating and go do an aspirin mask, take a shower, and get some beauty rest!

Will update later.

Goodnight!

My Debut

Watch the Wale video again and stop around the 2:29 mark.

I'm a video vixen.  Woot!

Netflix Update

The Reader - Read the book so I knew what was going to happen.  But didn't prepare me for the raciness when the book comes to life.  Thought they did a great job casting the young Ralph Fiennes character.  Mr. Ho noticed Kate Winslet's hairy armpits.  Of course.

Australia - I recall this movie getting panned.  Didn't it cost millions and tanked at the box office?  I thought it was pretty good.  Nicole Kidman's face looked weird.  Hugh Jackman, well, you can never go wrong with Wolverine.  And I knew Neil Fletcher looked familiar - Faramir from the Lord of the Ring series!  It was ridiculously long though.  I shed a few tears.

Today was a very productive wedding day.  I was sitting at the island, cranking away when I saw the storm a-brewin'.  And I will admit.  I was scurred!!  I saw the sky change, the trees look like they were about to be blown over, and the lightning strike.  I hate when thunder shakes the house.  Other than that, storms are pretty cool.

I can't wait to get the new iPhone!

There is no way I can post Mr. Ho's Dirty 30 video on here.  Youtube has a 10 minute limit on their site and this thing is a little over 16 minutes long.  Boo.

I really do try to read the news, but lately, I've been avoiding it.  Disappearing planes, journalists sentenced to hard labor, mom dead - baby taken out of uterus, american car industry going down the shitter...  it's so depressing.  I'd much rather immerse myself in Charm School and the Real Housewives of New Jersey.

You know what news coverage pisses me off?  The Jon & Kate + 8 crap.  I caught a few of the new episodes and I can't believe how much Kate has changed - high heels, pink sundresses, red leather jackets, skinny jeans, tanned, manicured, make-up done, hair done (if you call that backwards mullet, done)...  Seriously?  I miss her in sweatpants and when she had the belly of a dog's jowls, as she called it.  It's obvious her and Jon are so over.  Doing the past 2 seasons have completely killed their marriage.  They don't even do the interviews anymore.  How sad for the kids, who are still unbelievably cute!

And my last note of the day, I am so happy to announce the 2.55 is now in my possession!  WOOT!